Raze's Hell

That's just screwed up...

Raze is the living breathing embodiment of all that is un-cute. He is a disgusting and loathsome creature who is hell-bent on destroying our peaceful and loving Kewlett nation. Raze simply can’t tolerate how wonderful we are making the planet. He hates the joy and sunshine we bring. He hates the song we sing. And he’ll resort to any kind of underhanded tactics to try to get rid of us.

Get this. Raze sucks things up from the environment and shoots them at us. (Picture an anteater on ‘roids!) What kind of sad move is that? These pathetic parlor tricks, along with his lame melee attacks, are way too feeble to bring a group of our brave soldiers down. He may be the best fighter his race has, but to us he is nothing more than a joke. A big, butt-ugly joke.
We will soon be delivering his head on a platter to our beloved Princess

Hehehe.... I didn't even read that far. I saw the first part and thought it was funny. Hey, it's not every day you get a game named after you. :-)

Bummer dude, nice knowing you.
But you'll look good with no head, I'm quite sure.