I've been getting a lot of emails lately about jobs I may be qualified for. The level of ignorance or outright stupidity has been quite entertaining. In some of these cases, the humor may only apply to those of us in IT.
But, I wanted to share anyway.
See, that's what I want to see in a job email. It's right there in black and white. We reserve the right to screw your ass over, even on a whim. We all know when we take a job that we've sold our souls to the man, but damn, it's nice to finally see some honesty in a job posting.
I think I'll pass on that one.
My next favorite will appeal to those IT type's that understand how much crap we are expected to do. What, your a Network Engineer? Great, can you fix the daughter board of my dot-matrix printer? What the hell do you mean you can solder? I thought you "worked on 'puters"!
This job comes to you from the Airlines Industry. I think I'd rather play Russian Roulette than to gamble my future on the Airlines staying afloat in this economy.
That's right folks. The best candidate for this position will have a total of 122 Years of combined IT experience. More specifically, they want 8 years of expereince in VMWare. I found this on Google.
So if you weren't an early adopter, you don't qualify.
Where does HR pull these numbers from? Oh Yea, there asses....
Feel free to share any stupid job request you get in email. Just keep the company name and/or recruitment company anonymous.
But, I wanted to share anyway.
Nothing in this job description restricts managementâs right to assign or reassign duties and responsibilities to this job at any time.
See, that's what I want to see in a job email. It's right there in black and white. We reserve the right to screw your ass over, even on a whim. We all know when we take a job that we've sold our souls to the man, but damn, it's nice to finally see some honesty in a job posting.
I think I'll pass on that one.
My next favorite will appeal to those IT type's that understand how much crap we are expected to do. What, your a Network Engineer? Great, can you fix the daughter board of my dot-matrix printer? What the hell do you mean you can solder? I thought you "worked on 'puters"!
This job comes to you from the Airlines Industry. I think I'd rather play Russian Roulette than to gamble my future on the Airlines staying afloat in this economy.
Apache * 5+ Yrs.
Change Management 8+ Yrs.
Cisco 5+ Yrs.
Data Center space & power * 8+ Yrs.
DNS 5+ Yrs.
EMC * 8+ Yrs.
HP Blades 3+ Yrs.
Loadrunner 3+ Yrs.
Mid Range Servers * 8+ Yrs.
NFS * 8+ Yrs.
RedHat * 8+ Yrs.
Solaris 8+ Yrs.
Storage Devices * 8+ Yrs.
Tivoli 8+ Yrs.
Unix * 10+ Yrs.
VMWare * 8+ Yrs.
WebShpere MQ 3+ Yrs.
Websphere * 8+ Yrs.
That's right folks. The best candidate for this position will have a total of 122 Years of combined IT experience. More specifically, they want 8 years of expereince in VMWare. I found this on Google.
VMware launched its first product - VMware Workstation for developers and other technical professionals - in May 1999.
So if you weren't an early adopter, you don't qualify.
Where does HR pull these numbers from? Oh Yea, there asses....
Feel free to share any stupid job request you get in email. Just keep the company name and/or recruitment company anonymous.